gdi why did this get brought up to the top. :|
Almost lost my whole blog because of fucking google making everything need to be attached to a google account. I already lost my youtube account because I can't get into it. I'm just sick and fucking miserable and he's happy and he doesn't care at all. I hate it I'm either bawling or empty or brazenly stupid and egotistical and just stupid stupid stupid. My parents are deciding to be actual parents now and make me make my bed and keep everything off the floor and its fucking hilarious. All I want to do is off myself be to fucking rid of them. I fucking want boyfriends all the time so I have a reason not to kill myself. That's really it. Because without someone like that I'm just a waste. Money space air time. They make life more bearable and I finally found one guy who treated me wonderfully but he had to go and just stop liking me. How do you stop liking someone that fast. I could tell for weeks though so I guess it wasn't fast. But it was just pathetic/ridiculous how much he wanted me in the beginning so my ego has just been crushed to bits. I like how I'm more heartbroken over a guy I dated for a month than for two years. Just thinking back on all the little things. I should've went over to clean up his uncles house. I should've let him buy me the fucking Diana camera. I shouldn't have got drunk and told him I loved him then kept going with it til I did. I shouldn't have been myself basically cause that's when he stopped liking me. It'd be a lot better to be someone else anyways, I'm not that great. I don't even know who the fuck I am, such a deceiving little miserable fuck. I really just want him back. What the fuck did you mean by those songs? Do you want me back or not? Are you sad or not? I can't even trust you cause you made all these stupid little white lies over dumb ass shit. Fuck you, fuck third eye blind, fuck me. Just please fuck me I'm fucked fucked fucked.